Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Dear Tami...I want to Know

I had a "brilliant" idea last night in bed.  Why these stupid things always hit me at night, I'll never know.  You know how there are Dear Abby columns and things like that?  I wanted to start my own.  Stupid?  Probably.  

So I sent a message to some of my facebook friends.  Some were NOT happy. Sorry about that.  Facebook really needs to change it's settings.  You see, it send the reply from friends to everyone.  Oops.  I'm actually a little embarrassed.  

So here it goes...BTW if you have a question you want me to answer just email me at tami.warner@gmail.com  No subject is off limits.

Actually before I answer some of the questions I have to make the disclaimer that because no subject is off limits it might get a little raunchy.  Can't handle it?  Then don't read them.  I'll let you know in the subject line if it's racy!  

So NOW here it goes...(these are actual questions people want me to answer)

J wants to know something about being LDS (Mormon) that she doesn't already know. 

Well, Joy, that's a toughie.  I don't know how much you know about Mormons. We might come across as a little lot strange!  But once you get to know us, you'll find that the horns that Mormons are born with are quickly and quietly filed off soon after birth.  It really doesn't leave that much of a mark.  We really love our gardens.  And it's practically a sin in Utah not to have one!  We also LOVE to share the abundant zucchini we grow.  I think that the only reason we grow it is to share it with those sinner neighbors who don't grow a garden.  You'll see people drop it off at houses late at night, in the dark. 

You aren't supposed to drink coffee if you are Mormon.  Why?  I have NO idea.  So they find other ways to caffeinate themselves!  A favorite among LDS people is Diet Coke.  And anyone who says Mormons can't drink caffeine is ignorant.

M says...Someone told me you were on Dr. Phil.  Is that true and if so, what made you go on TV?

Oh geez.  Yes, it's totally true.  We were on the show 10 years ago.  We were on a show about fighting in front of your kids.  It was one of the darkest times in my life, honestly!  Why?  I have no idea.  I still don't know why I did it.  I will say this, be careful when you watch TV shows.  It's TV.  They will edit and edit until it's the way THEY want it.  

We had cameras set up in our home and every 2 hours or so a producer would call me and ask if we had had a fight yet.  I finally got so tired of the calls.  So we staged a fight.  I'm totally serious.  

Don't think that they follow up with you either.  Once you tape, they forget all about it.  We got mugs.  That's all.  

That was in another lifetime for me.  The Hubs and I are proof that people can change and make their marriage work!

And finally (since the whole religion thing came up already)...

J wants to know why it is assumed that because I am living in Utah I am LDS, active, a republican and don't know how to think?

 Because they are asses, J.

You've heard the assuming expression, right?  When you assume something you make an ASS out of U and ME! .  
I had this whole, lengthy explanation typed up but I keep coming back to the same conclusions.  Some people are just straight up asses.  

Oh and don't assume that because I was raised Mormon and live in Utah I am still practicing and am still active.  You might just be wrong!


P.S. More questions will be answered next time!





   



  




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